February‘s theme for Voices of Berlin is My Worst Nightmare.
“I’m very fascinated by dreams that I remember. I know one thing that just terrifies me and will always go back and forth in my brain. It’s common: being claustrophobic. Being locked into something somehow like… I’ve had really weird dreams.
So, one that I had a lot when I was younger was that I was in a tunnel and, it sounds really dramatic, but there was a light in front at the end of the tunnel. It was like I was in the underground and the walls became smaller and smaller and I was going quicker and quicker but I never reached the light. There’s a whole thing about being crushed while going quicker, not getting out and you have no control.
Then there’s one that’s quite funny that I had when I was about 14. I was actually screaming so bad that my dad could hear me from the 1st floor – we had two floors – and he had to come up and take me down to the kitchen, half-sleeping and freaking out basically. I thought my whole body was swelling up, you know like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory where she becomes a blueberry? I saw my dad below, I was looking down on him and I was up high because I’d blown up and soon I was going to explode if the room didn’t get bigger. So, that was claustrophobia too, there was no space for me to blow up.
There was a third dream that I had recently that I was locked in a really small room, on top of a house and the window was too small, no one could hear me and there was no door out. I just knew I was going to die there. It was terrible and I didn’t know what to do. Eventually, in my dream, I just became super small and managed to jump out the window, all the way down to the ground and survived somehow, so… I overcame the fear.”
Voices of Berlin is Berlin Untelevised‘s monthly Lives project. This project is to show the connection behind real lives within this both crazy and wonderful city by asking it’s many residents one question or theme a month. Our ultimate goal is to curate a collection of accounts on many topics, ending each month with an abstract poem created through that month’s selection of responses and, thus, transform Berlin into a poet.
Read Moa’s contribution to this month’s Voices of Berlin poem and its collection of other Berliner accounts in February’s My Worst Nightmare in the first week of March. If you’re a Berliner, find out how to add a contribution by emailing the editor of Lives lorathepoet(@)gmail.com.